sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.