break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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