She's JV to your varsity
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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