my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
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Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
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We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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