she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I just want to make out with him forever
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
