i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize