watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
