i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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