just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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