jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize