Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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