after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
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