I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize