White coat. Heels.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
