i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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