He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize