it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
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