I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
