how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
