Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
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Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
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I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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