I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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