apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Boobs speak an international language.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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