You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
