Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
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