he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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