remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
