just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
