Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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