He is an equal opportunity slut.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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