Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize