is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
