Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
i think i just lost a toe
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
