Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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