Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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