Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
