check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
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