when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
