google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
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Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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