I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
