The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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