so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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