there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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