I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
