i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize