11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
wakey wakey hands off snakey
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize