Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Floor bacon is actually really good
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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