I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize