She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
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