I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
