My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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