This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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