Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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