she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
